Whoa....what's happening?

December 27, 2010, 9:30 AM. The exact time when I received my first ever manicure, for the wondrous occasion of John (my son) and Katie’s wedding! The bridesmaids and both mothers had bright red fingernails, which perfectly matched the wedding colors.

I normally keep my nails well trimmed; I’ve never liked long fingernails on myself and I cannot stand the feel of fingernail polish—its “heavy” on the ends of my fingers (some of you will understand that). However, since I knew I was going to get a manicure for the wedding, for several weeks I had carefully grown my nails. It made me very aware of everything I did with my hands because having a longer fingernail changes the dynamic of touch (especially typing, texting, and picking one’s nose). But I succeeded and the manicurist praised me for my diligence, nail shape, and bravery (although she took pity on me and gave me a free bottle of polish remover because she thought I’d take it off as soon as the wedding was over, which I did not do; it lasted until Wednesday).

That red nail polish was beautiful and I felt confident that when I pointed at something people would really notice and look where the laser-red nail was pointing. Or when I talked with my hands (which I do a lot) the flashes of red would keep listeners’ attention. I felt more mature; like that 15 minutes of trimming, emery-boarding, lotioning, and polishing were rites of passage into a more fashionable adulthood.

I was sure that after the wedding I would trim my nails to return them to their normal length, however when I prepared to do that I just couldn’t. In fact, this morning I looked through my daughter’s polish and chose a light lavender shade, which perfectly matched my shirt. And before my morning devotions, I polished my nails. Whoa….what’s happening to me?

This little experience reminds me of change; specifically the change that is happening here at camp. Our new vision and new logo will be launched this month which will bring excitement and energy into our already vital ministry. It will also bring adjustments; we will feel this change in profound ways as we strike out in faith following God’s lead. The new vision will change the dynamics of this camp; some changes we will embrace and enjoy, but other changes will bring frustration and sorrow. All change, even good things, ushers in a grieving process, so we must be attentive to the rites of passage that will shape this ministry into a more mature model of God’s Kingdom on earth.

Another change will result from the fact that I have resigned from the Camp Director position effective August 31, 2011. God is calling me to embark on a new journey with Him which will involve pastoral ministry of some sort (He hasn’t told me yet). For me this is a lot like the fingernail polish story. I’ve been involved in camp ministry for ten years and I like it (most of the time I even love it). But I know that God is ready to give me a “spiritual manicure”—something new that I have not ever done before. So I’ve been allowing some new growth within my mind & spirit, and it is changing how I think and how I function. I feel this process deeply—sometimes with deep sorrow, sometimes with relief, sometimes with a bit of panic; but I know it is what God desires for me, my family, for the camp, and for whatever new ministry I enter. It will feel and look different from anything I’ve known so far but it certainly will shape me into a more obedient and mature follower of Jesus Christ!

So please pray for the camp, the Board as they conduct a search for a new Director, for the staff, and for me as I faithfully serve these last eight months in a remarkable ministry!