Fifteen Things I Have Learned in Fifteen Years of Ministry

After reading and sharing this post by April Yamasaki, I was challenged to compose my own list. I have been in church pastoral ministry for three years, but if I go back to when I started in Christian camp ministry, I can count almost fifteen years of experience in God’s Kingdom work. 

First, my personal mission statement: “I desire to live a life of integrity and authenticity marked by intimacy with God, to grow in sensitivity to the whispers of the Holy Spirit, and to live a life of faithful, loving obedience to God’s call, Christ’s love, and the empowerment of the Holy Spirit.”

There are six vital goals in that statement; integrity, authenticity, intimacy, sensitivity, obedience, and being empowered. You will read echoes of those in the following list.

1. Devotion. I need to continue learning how to love God with my whole being and to focus all my energies into daily worship of Jesus Christ. Without this central core value to my life I would be just another person struggling to find fulfillment and contentment in the vast resources of the world; searching and not finding completion, stressed and not finding hope. Staying centered on God redefines not just the ordinary, but everything. I will spend my entire earthly life working on this.

2. Cultivate prayer as constant conversation. I’ve had seasons of vibrant daily hour+ long prayer times, very dry seasons when all I could whisper was “help”; and unnerving seasons of silence. Over time, what has emerged is constant conversation with God, speaking and listening. If I truly believe God is present at all times (and I do), then I talk to him. Constantly. And honestly.

3. Always follow through on nudges of the Spirit (this requires item #2). Expect surprises!

4. Cultivate stillness. I am not very good at holding still. When I was little my mother would give me a quarter if I would hold still or be quiet for five/ten/fifteen minutes (I did not make much money on that offer). However, in the stillness of both body and mouth, I learn to distinguish God’s voice from that of my own, and the lying voices of the world and God’s enemy.

5. Participation in communal worship with a body of believers. It is within the assembly of believers that I will find my identity as God’s child and a member of the family of faith. There we commit ourselves to God and each other for accountability, mutual love and concern, ministry, and witness. I am blessed, so very blessed, by my Lindale family! 

6. Allow others to minister to me. I am human, too. I must admit when I struggle and ask for help when needed. I have been so well-cared for by my brothers and sisters during my seasons of anxiety, sorrow, and fear. What beautiful gifts of grace! 

7. Integrity. I strive for consistency in behavior and principals so that my words and deeds are undivided. I desire to offer a complete witness of a life given to following Jesus Christ. Again, a life-long endeavor.

8. Hold ministry loosely. This is God’s work to which he has invited and empowered me. Any praise goes right back to God (a pride check). Likewise, complaints must also be filtered; what is true in what is being said to me, and how should I attend to it? Conversely, what, as I like to say, are “not my monkeys” and can be released to God for him to attend to? Sometimes I’ve needed a trusted friend to help me with that processing.

9. Holistic self-care; spiritual; mental/psychological, and physical. My choices in all areas of life can be life-giving or life-draining. I need to be attentive to my whole being and care for all aspects of my person. I really need people to hold me accountable to this, as well! 

10. Family first! I learned this through a very difficult lesson. I do not apologize for taking time to care for my family relationships.

11. I am not indispensable. There are thousands of people who can perform my job as well or better than I. Ministry is God’s work and it can and will continue without me (and in spite of me)! I want to do what God has called me to do and do it passionately, but need to remember to be humble through it all.

12. Close friendships with like-minded individuals, as well as those who can offer me challenge, are beneficial to my whole being! God has been blessing me with friendships that are mutually life-giving!

13. Laughter and fun! At camp, we had quote boards that were always a source of mirth (and only a few people knew of the one on the back of my office door). Something as simple as a Lego figurine can provide a lot of entertainment.

14. Hard Work. Do something that has immediate satisfying results. Ministry often does not have visible results. At camp I would mow, or help clean, or organize something just so I had a gratifying reward. Working in the soil also provides me enjoyment because it is very tactile; dirt under my fingernails and grass stains on my feet make me happy.

15. Always be willing to do anything. I would always tell the camp staff; “I will never ask you to do something that I am not willing to do myself. Unless it involves reptiles.”

So, there you have my list of things I have learned in fifteen years of working alongside God. I am thankful for these lessons and for every person with whom I have shared the journey!

Ten minute sabbath

You know you need it.
Stress. Anxiety. Worry.
Busyness.
God rested. Jesus rested. The Holy Spirit rests upon us.
We are commanded
invited
welcomed
to cease
to rest
restore
commune with God.
Sit back in your chair, take a couple deep breaths, click play, and close your eyes.
Listen.

Close enough

“Close enough”

     I have this big bay window in our front room. Finding curtains for this thing was a challenge, but years ago, after perusing JCPenny catalogs (pre-internet days) I came up with this:

     However, I could not afford the curved curtain rod that I needed. So I busted out my creative energy and gently bent straight rods to fit this curve. I hate taking them down to wash because it is such a pain to hang them back up, and it requires two people. But when I was decorating for Christmas I noticed that they needed washed so down they came, washed they were, and my dear hubby (who made fun of me for having to stand on a stool when he could just reach up) helped me put them back up. Then I had to readjust the tie-backs and the tops so that it all was balanced.

Because, yes I need balance.

     But as I worked on getting those curtains perfectly spaced I remembered one of my favorite phrases, “Close enough.” I learned it from my dad. A carpenter. He once told me that there are many things in carpentry that do require perfection (finish work, plumbing, electricity, etc.), but there are some things for which “close enough” works well. I've discovered that this phrase is appropriate for other aspects of life, too.

Like, folding fitted sheets.

     Once upon a camp-time, I chose the word “excellence” as the yearly theme for the year-round staff. We challenged each other to strive for excellence in every task we did at camp, including how we lived our faith. The verse for this theme was, “Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.” Mt 5:48.

     One day during our weekly Bible study we had a discussion about perfection versus excellence. Excellence means setting a high standard for yourself in everything you do and working towards doing the best that you can. Perfection means being free from flaw or defect. Excellence is the process by which one may achieve perfection. However, it was noted, perfection is often unachievable, daunting, often frustrating, and can cause someone to not even begin a task. Why would Jesus say that we have to be perfect LIKE GOD?! Is that not IMPOSSIBLE?

     Look at this verse in context. Jesus was talking about loving your enemies. Be perfect in love. The Greek word for perfect means “brought to its end, finished; wanting nothing necessary to completeness.” Love like the Father. Love like the Son. Love like that is only possible through the power of the Holy Spirit.

     Paul’s often left off introduction to the “love chapter,” 1 Cor 13, is this:

 “And yet I will show you the most excellent way.” 1 Cr 12:31b.

     The Greek word for excellent means “a throwing beyond.” Paul is saying, "Set this high standard for yourself; go beyond what is considered normal and strive for the already finished perfect love of God!"

     No, I cannot achieve perfection in love on my own. "Close enough" does not apply to loving others. But by striving for excellence in all things (1 Cor 13), I have set my feet on the path of the Father’s already complete and finished perfect love of Christ. The only way to achieve perfection in loving others, especially those who may be my enemies, is by submitting to the power of the Holy Spirit. In doing so, I have already tapped into the finished and complete, perfect, self-giving love of the Father.  

For my spiritual life the most excellent phrase, "Close to the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit" is the epitome of perfection.

Reordering our world

Some people do not like change. Some people like things to stay just the way they are, if those things are healthy and full of good memories. And if change happens, they lament about the way things used to be and wish for a return to those times. When I was packing orders for Lehman’s Hardware there were oil lamps, washboards and hand wringers, make your own soap—I don’t really want to return to those things! Give me electricity and a flush toilet, thank you! But sometimes the new reality that comes about is so much better that there is no longing to return to the previous way.

Now about this “reordering” thing of God’s…raising valleys, leveling mountains, clearing paths and such. Mary poetically spoke about God’s activity in Luke 1—humble/blessed, scatter the proud, humble the rulers, raise the humble, feed the hungry while the rich go hungry. Jesus quoted Is 61 when he spoke in the synagogue in Nazareth, with words of reordering….Lk 4:18-21…and it nearly got him killed right there at the beginning of his earthly ministry. It just seems so obvious to us that God was CHANGING stuff…or rather returning the world to the way he had created it to be.

And sometimes I wonder; if God wanted to reorder the world why didn't he just do it! Just use the “big guns” of MIGHT & FORCE to get the reordering business accomplished! Instead, He went to all the trouble of humbling himself…Phil 2:8-11…and Jesus did indeed feed the hungry, set free those imprisoned by sin and sickness, and preached good news. Why didn't God just keep that going?! Jesus, just hang around and keep doin’ whatcha been doin’!

           But, no. Jesus was crucified, rose from the dead, and…went back to heaven. Then, the Holy Spirit arrived.

One of the astounding beliefs of the Israelites was that their God “saw” their distress, he “heard” their cries, and he “came down” to deliver them. Theirs was no idol of wood or stone; their God was alive and active, caring and merciful. Yahweh lived among them and dwelt in a tent of animal skins. 2 Sam 7:6-7. And all-mighty God lived and traveled among his people.

THAT WAS UNEXPECTED. “Be holy because I am holy,” He said.

Now look at Mary’s song in Lk 1:46-55. She talked about being blessed by God. The Israelites thought of themselves as blessed by God. But their understanding of blessing was more of simply reversing the world’s hierarchy—“take away Rome’s power and give it to us!” But simply switching who is on top and who is on bottom leaves the old order in place, and God has something else in mind—exploding the whole system. The promise God made to Abram Gn 12:1-3 was not that Israel would rule over all the other nations but that it would be a blessing to them. Raised valleys and lowered mountains create a level, cleared plain.

After Pentecost, after the Holy Spirit “came down,” suddenly the whole murky concept of reordering the world began to be seen. Acts tells wonderful stories of God’s followers who “get it.” The Spirit pushed the edges of their human understanding of God’s Kingdom. Suddenly the believers saw what God had wanted, what Jesus had come to do! Suddenly Is 61, Mary’s song, and Jesus’ summarization of the Ten Commandments as “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, and mind; Love your neighbor as you love yourself” BECAME REALITY through the power of Holy Spirit living in and through us. If God had used MIGHT & FORCE (brought out his big guns) to get this world reordering business accomplished, then we would have done the same.

But God came as a baby. Quietly, during the night, with animals in attendance. A few shepherds enjoyed an angelic concert. Some wise men brought a few gifts. Peaceful. Wonderful. Counselor. Mighty God. Everlasting. Father. Prince of Peace. Of the increase of his government and peace there will be no end.

We serve a God who lifts the lowly, fills the hungry, and chooses an unwed teenage girl for a role of greatest honor. God’s shalom overturns the world’s assumptions about what matters and what doesn't. And we followers of The Way, who carry the power of the Holy Spirit in our tents of human skin, are to do the same. We, through the power and the strength of the Holy Spirit, are to continue to reorder this world one baby step at a time, with love, joy, and peace.

           But HOW?! How do we begin to demonstrate this new kingdom reordering now? How am I supposed to change the world? It’s too overwhelming!

Opportunities to be a person of the Light; to lift the lowly, comfort the sorrowful, to stand firm in truth—are everywhere. However, every day, you & I are literally surrounded with opportunities to NOT be a child of the Light, Peace and Love! What we watch, what we read, what we think, how we speak, how we interact with others; the list goes on and on. But because of the presence of the Divine living in me, and the call to reorder the world with God’s peace and love, every morning on my way to work I beg God for the strength to stand firm in truth. It is not easy–every night I have to ask forgiveness for failing.

How are we to change the world? Just like this:

     First, ask God to open your eyes and ears to what he is already doing around you.

     Second, ask God for the strength to stand firm in Truth. And guess what? Truth is a person; the Spirit of Truth whom you carry around with you.

I have to say, that once you pray the first thing (open my eyes and ears) you will be amazed, you will be saddened, you will feel conviction, and you will be encouraged by what you hear and see. God is always at work around us; we just aren't always paying attention. And when you pray for the first AND the second (stand firm in the Spirit of Truth) you will be convicted. It may be the same conversation as the day before, the same situations, the same people you work with, but because you opened the door for God to reorder YOU, you either won’t be able to participate in that sameness, or you’ll be moved to engage in it in a new way; with words of love, joy, and peace. That co-worker, or fellow student, or family member, or neighbor, or person you avoid at all costs, or person you have labeled weird or gross…God will change YOUR attitude towards them.

The point God wants us to understand is that REORDERING THE WORLD begins with REORDERING US. We want God to do what we want God to do!!! And God has said and continues to say, “I want you to do what I want you to do—love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. I started it; you keep it going. Spread the Good News of Jesus everywhere.”

There are some believers who go into the world and do large, highly visible world reordering stuff; Mother Teresa, Billy Graham, Shane Claiborne, Leymah Gboowee (EMU grad who was one of three women who recently were awarded the Noble Peace Prize “for their nonviolent struggle for the safety of women and for women’s rights to full participation in peace-building work" in Liberia (nobelprize.org.). However, the majority of us will be called to the smaller, behind-the-scenes world reordering stuff.

Acts 4:13 “When they saw the courage of Peter and John and realized that they were unschooled, ordinary men, they were astonished and they took note that these men had been with Jesus.”

Acts 11:19-21 “Now those who had been scattered by the persecution that broke out when Stephen was killed traveled as far as Phoenicia, Cyprus and Antioch, spreading the word only among Jews. Some of them, however, men from Cyprus and Cyrene, went to Antioch and began to speak to Greeks also, telling them the good news about the Lord Jesus. The Lord’s hand was with them, and a great number of people believed and turned to the Lord.”

Reordering the world with the Good News of peace with God, peace with others begins with reordering me, you, us. God raises the valleys and lowers the mountains within US first! Then—it is no longer just about us! Leveling begins the minute you step out into the world, the second you encounter another human. First, ask God to open your eyes and ears to what he is already doing around you. Second, ask God for the strength to stand firm in Truth. Expect the unexpected; the Spirit is all about change!

Our challenge is to expect the unexpected acts of God! Practice 1 & 2, be so loyal to the Spirit within you that HE can do HIS WORK through YOU.

Mystery

Story 1
I sat beside the bed of an unresponsive dying person, surrounded by those who cared and who expressed their love with tears and touch. Someone said, "Go ahead and do what you do." So I read some scripture of promise and assurance. Then I opened my hymnal. I sang the verses of "Amazing Grace." I silently asked God what to sing next, and turned to "Oh, the deep, deep love of Jesus."

The breathing began to slow, color to fade.

"Jesus, I am resting, resting"

Quietness, peacefulness, slowing of time and breath. Until, with the words "Resting neath thy smile Lord Jesus, earth's dark shadows flee" the veil between present and eternity parted and the dying one breathed celestial air in the presence of God.

The experience of singing while a child of God took those final earthly steps and first heavenly baby steps exposed a glimpse of mystery to me. There was a part of me that wanted to follow; imagine the surprise, the party, the glory! But we who remained at the bedside began to pick up, clean up, grieve, and go about the work of living on this side of the separating veil

Story 2
I recently attended a retreat during which the speaker used this painting The five thousand on a meditation of Mark 6:35-44. There is much going on in the painting and I encourage you to study it along with the biblical text. One of the major movements in the painting goes from the bottom right, diagonally up and around to the top right. The pastor is faceless (and thus genderless), is preaching from the Bible--"breaking the Bread"--feeding the people's souls, while they eat the fish and chips that feeds their bodies.

And right behind the pastor is a rectangle of blackness. Mystery.

It overwhelms me, as it should, this call to be the faceless one who stands before the hungry, the indifferent, the busy, the attentive; to preach and teach, to enter the mystery and be the hands and feet of Christ.

"Am I willing to be faceless one so that others will see and feed on Jesus?"

---
These two stories represent my call to active work and to sit vigil; to minister to the living and the dying. I passionately want, desperately need, to continue to grip this mystery; the presence of the Holy Trinity in the daily rhythms of being and doing.

Ever lift Thy face upon me,
As I work and wait for Thee;
Resting 'neath Thy smile, Lord Jesus,
Earth's dark shadows flee.
Brightness of my Father's glory,
Sunshine of my Father's face,
Keep me ever trusting, resting,
Fill me with Thy grace.

Fall near

Musings from a fall day a few years ago...

In the foothills of the Appalachian mountains, in a small house with a lot of people. Inside it is hot and noisy with conversation. Outside there is a cool fall morning; yellow leaves, red poison ivy, misty and quiet.

 I need quiet and calm. I need to be near God.

There is very little human sound outside. In fact, my own steps and movements of clothing seem a rude interruption. So I sit on a narrow, winding strip of blacktop smack in the middle of the road. This is where the sounds and sights greet me.

Owls, chickadees, crows, cooper’s hawks, blue jays, flickers, pileated woodpeckers, turkeys, titmice, catbirds, chipmunks, kingfishers, chipping sparrows, spider webs, sassafras bark, redbuds, leaves falling, nuts dropping, goats with bells, and cows mooing. Nature can be noisy.

A hillside covered with trees, thick foliage, but a single yellow leaf falling draws my eyes. A bird jumps from branch to limb. Tiny movements, tiny sounds.

Silence isn’t so. Is there ever silence? How can one silence the voice in one’s mind? If there is an absolute absence of external sound, the voice in one’s mind seems exceedingly loud. There is no way to stop that sound.

So, how does one guide the inner voice to whisper, to express only valuable words or thoughts? To stay focused on the purpose before one? For me that purpose is to listen for and be aware of God’s presence. But my own inner voice interrupts, makes inappropriate comments, strives to change the subject, yammers about nothing particular, and has the attention span of a five year old.

Controlling my inner voice is difficult. It’s like there are two personalities in there; the inner child who just loves to talk and have attention, and the inner adult who tries to keep control. Often the child wins, and often it is the child who learns something fascinating; the way a dew drop magnifies the veins on a leaf, the pollen-filled legs of a bumblebee, tiny yellow flowers and small purple asters in the ditch. But always, the adult is listening for a deeper meaning; where is God in the small stuff, do I magnify God in my life, am I carrying the pollen of the gospel?

Everyone decides to go on a walk; some run, some walk, some ride. I walk but linger behind the happily noisy group until they are far enough ahead and I can no longer hear them. Again trying to find space to be alone with God. 

If I can’t see, hear, smell, taste or touch God, with what sense do I know Him? How do I become aware of Him?

And right there, in that moment, the Spirit whispers to both my inner-perpetual-motion-child and my seeking-calm-and-purpose-adult that it’s a "soul-sense"

the Spirit of God within that is in tune with the Father

who provides the awesome sense that 

bestows the inner surety that 

when I am still

silent 

and seek to draw near to God, 

I will discover that

God…is…always…near.

Religion and spirituality

 

 

Religion and spirituality are like the notes of a song; moving and playing throughout my life. Sometimes the notes are in harmony, sometimes in unison, sometimes in dissonance, but they are always a part of the music of my being.

Deb Horst