I decided long ago that just giving up chocolate, or tv, or pop, was just not sacrificial enough for me. If I am going to give up something, shouldn't it be something that really needs to go? For the past three years I have given up meats and sweets for Lent. That means a steady diet of fruits, vegetables and whole grains. Sounds healthy, right? Right. And that is exactly the point. I am learning to eat to live, not live to eat.
I do not like the stronghold that is "food." I rarely eat for pleasure or for hunger; I mostly eat from boredom and sometimes frustration. I overeat because I can. "Portion control" means I can control the portion and usually my portions are large (in our house when serving ice cream one asks, "Do you want a regular size or a Miller size?"). Sometimes I don't know exactly why I eat the way I do (read here for an interesting reflection on the psychology of overeating). Overeating and eating the wrong things are very much a problem for me. Giving up "meats and sweets" is an opportunity for me to take back control.
Today's reading from Oswald Chambers My Utmost for His Highest says this:
The first thing I must be willing to admit when I begin to examine what controls and dominates me is that I am the one responsible for having yielded myself to whatever it may be. If I am a slave to myself, I am to blame because somewhere in the past I yielded to myself. Likewise, if I obey God I do so because at some point in my life I yielded myself to Him.
If a child gives in to selfishness, he will find it to be the most enslaving tyranny on earth. There is no power within the human soul itself that is capable of breaking the bondage of the nature created by yielding. For example, yield for one second to anything in the nature of lust, and although you may hate yourself for having yielded, you become enslaved to that thing. (Remember what lust is— “I must have it now,” whether it is the lust of the flesh or the lust of the mind.) No release or escape from it will ever come from any human power, but only through the power of redemption. You must yield yourself in utter humiliation to the only One who can break the dominating power in your life, namely, the Lord Jesus Christ. “. . . He has anointed Me . . . to proclaim liberty to the captives . . .” (Luke 4:18 and Isaiah 61:1).
When you yield to something, you will soon realize the tremendous control it has over you. Even though you say, “Oh, I can give up that habit whenever I like,” you will know you can’t. You will find that the habit absolutely dominates you because you willingly yielded to it. It is easy to sing, “He will break every fetter,” while at the same time living a life of obvious slavery to yourself. But yielding to Jesus will break every kind of slavery in any person’s life.
Lent provides me space to experience what it means to yield myself to Christ. Lent forces me to see the ugly selfishness of my human nature; I see it and I hate it. "I am the one to blame," says Chambers. And that is true. Which only makes me hate that lust even more. The dark struggle of Lent allows me to live in the stinky back alley shadow of "self," so that I may better understand that the redemption of Jesus Christ is the only hope I have!
Easter is HOPE! Easter is FREEDOM! Easter is REDEMPTION! Easter celebrates Christ reaching down and lifting me out of the desperation and filth of self, and into His NEW LIFE!
And that, my friends, in choosing to give up something for Lent, I am really choosing to give up all rights to my self, and give myself to my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Romans 6.
